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Monday, December 14th, 2009Self-publishing that makes money
Tuesday, November 24th, 2009The brass of self-publishers is without limit, but one fellow named vic.martin, just sent me an email I have to post. It cuts to the heart of self-publishing and eliminates all the usual risks. Here’s what vic says:
Just a brief insight of my ways and means of making millions of Euros, I have a printing papers for printing Euros currencies, the result is that of original Euro currency, Upon your request, samples are readily availble for your perusal, so that you can check out the result, it has no different with the ordinary Euro currency, the bank accepts it as the production is of a very high quality,it is generally acceptable legal tender.
The brass of self-publishers is without limit, but one fellow named vic.martin, just sent me an email I have to share. His plan cuts to the heart of self-publishing and eliminates all the usual risks of turning what you print into money. As always, the author’s own voice is so much better than any summary I could craft:
Just a brief insight of my ways and means of making millions of Euros, I have a printing papers for printing Euros currencies, the result is that of original Euro currency, Upon your request, samples are readily availble for your perusal, so that you can check out the result, it has no different with the ordinary Euro currency, the bank accepts it as the production is of a very high quality,it is generally acceptable legal tender.
If any US Treasury Agents are reading my blog, get in touch. I’ll be happy to pass on vic’s email address.
Harlequin Hystericals
Friday, November 20th, 2009We are living in the world of The Onion. After opening the week announcing Harlequin Horizons, the pay-to-be-published venture, and getting called on it, the Big Romance Publisher shot itself in the other foot yesterday by responding to the RWA response by saying:
“we have heard the concerns that you, our authors, have expressed regarding the potential confusion between this venture and our traditional business. As such, we are changing the name of the self-publishing company from Harlequin Horizons to a designation that will not refer to Harlequin in any way. We will initiate this process immediately. We hope this allays the fears many of you have communicated to us.”
Harlequin employs lots of literate people who understand things like character motivation and the credibility of prose. How then, did they write this stuff? The wording is clear and concise but understanding the context is lacking; it’s like publishing a romance novel with no romance. It addresses all the superficial text of the issue, without grasping the point: the business operated by this venture would not be an acceptable career for the hero of an Harlequin Romance. Changing the name for what you are doing is not going to make the activities acceptable. I’m sure any mystery author could spot the problem: rationalize everything during questioning but don’t let go of the game.
If this slackness in business catches on, we will shortly see announcements like these:
- Miss America no longer pole-dancing under her title. While reigning as the symbol of purity she will be Miss America; while dancing, she will use the name Fifi La Boom-Boom.
- Bernie Madoff’s Ponzi operations relaunched as The American Pretend Funds: “We realized the public is unlikely to send money to Madoff With Your Money 2, but the Madoff business model is too good to let go so we changed the name. American Pretend Funds isn’t about being rich, its about imagining being rich. We help people pursue their dreams. We have to keep the dream alive.”
To quote that old saw, “you can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a pig.”
Thanks to novelist John Barnes for the Miss America line. Read about John’s new novel Tales of the Madman Underground here.
Read more about our agency at our page at Publishers Marketplace.
Amazing Earthquake Trick
Monday, May 18th, 2009Los Angeles experienced a 4.7 earthquake last night. Carolyn and I were sitting on the sofa when the shaking began. This was the most sudden and violent quake I’ve felt in 20+ years in LA. Nothing broke and no damage is apparent, yet one, and only one, book out of a thousand on our shelves, jumped out of a bookcase and hit the floor with a resounding BAM. The book in question was Ricky Jay’s Journal of Anomalies, a collection of his essays on hoaxsters, hustlers, and cheats (to quote the cover). This flying book event is worth a blog entry because Jay’s profession, when not writing books, is making objects do unexpected things. How did he do this; he wasn’t even in the room? See Ricky at work on this youtube video. (Disclaimer: Ricky Jay is not a client; I just like his work.)
Reading publisher’s contracts is much like watching a card trick. Where did the author’s rights go? What’s the value of the contract? Everything seems to be clear in paragraph 5, but wow, paragraph 11 really controls the deal.
